Rubber Cement

The last handful of years have been difficult for a variety of reasons.  As I reflect back on the journey, I have come to understand more about how I dealt with the circumstances thrust upon me and those I created by my own series of choices.  Rubber cement is a good way of describing this timeframe.  Remember rubber cement from time spent in elementary school?  Opening up the metal canister would fill the room with a noxious smell not easy to clear from the sinuses!  Then, we would begin gluing the soon-to-be masterpieces in front of us.  The glue would inevitably stick to our hands and make a goopy mess.  But, the magic of rubber cement is that when it dries you can rub your fingers and the glue becomes a rubber-like ball which easily falls off the hands.  And, the smell disappears.  Incredible stuff, rubber cement is.

Rubber cement works two ways.  If the glue is placed on just one surface, it creates a flexible, nonpermanent bond that can be repositioned later.  However, if the glue is placed on both surfaces and then allowed to dry first, it becomes a permanent bond when placed together.  It’s a pretty magical process if you can tolerate the initial stink and messiness.  Isn’t that life as well?  Sometimes you have to tolerate the smell and stickiness before the masterpiece unfolds.  You also have to decide how you are going to approach the glue.  Is a permanent bond needed or is something flexible needed?

For the longest time, I kept trying to make the wrong types of bonds work without understanding the true nature of the glue.  It’s only successful when both sides are involved in the right way.  My controlling nature continually tried to work against the chemistry of rubber cement.  For instance, I exhausted myself trying a flexible approach when that wasn’t in the best interest of the project.  Conversely, I also exhausted myself forcing permanency when this was destroying the artwork that was intended to unfold.  Eventually, I became afraid to open the rubber cement canister, because I wasn’t confident I could handle the smell or the mess.  As a result, I wasn’t mindful of how to approach what was in front of me.  Instead, I attempted to glue things together in a haphazard way.  Admittedly, I made a disaster of my world.

Then, I took a deep breath and realized the stench wouldn’t last forever if I decided to finally use the glue the right way.  I started studying the projects in front of me and began using the rubber cement more productively.  My children, my work, my doctoral studies, and meaningful relationships became my purpose to thrive.  Something wonderful resulted: the masterpieces already in my reach became my joy.  True joy.  I let the glue work the way it was supposed to based on the need.  Any glue that stuck to my hand wasn’t going to stay there forever.  If I let it dry, I could now rub it off.  The smell disappeared, and something beautiful revealed itself.

Changepoints:

As you begin to open your “rubber cement” canister to create a new work of art, ponder this:

·       How will I allow myself to cope with the smell and mess of gluing my life together while I tackle what is ahead?
·       Am I approaching what needs to be glued in my life with the best perspective?  
·       What will I look for to decide if what I am facing needs a permanent or flexible tactic?
·       How will I know when the glue has dried enough to touch the masterpiece in front of me? 

·       Am I willing to remove the unneeded glue from my fingers that doesn’t serve in my best interest or the finished project? 

Embrace the process of allowing rubber cement in your life.  Glue it, rub your fingers to rid the extra glue when you are done, breathe in the clean air, and soak in the beauty.

outSIGHTin, LLC: Creating empowered awareness as a changepoint for desired outcomes.