Acronyms

The company I work for decided to change banks after being with a particular establishment for years.  Because of the length of time with the old bank, little thought had previously been given about what was needed in a new institution.  So, after doing research, a local bank was chosen as the new bank.  A team met and a plan was formulated about what financial products we needed and how the transition should occur.  Accounts were established and a training timeline was determined.

However, during the introductory meeting there were some red flags signaling that not all the parties were on the same page or having a shared understanding.  Acronyms were used by the bank employees that didn’t make sense to those of us attending from my company.  We attempted to ask clarifying questions, but I think our lack of knowledge and fear of being embarrassed shut down our willingness to ask more probing questions.  As a result, we signed up for a set of financial products believed to be fitting of our needs.

Shortly after this process, we received a little machine in the mail from a bank.  It was absolutely foreign to us.  But we asked no questions, moved forward with the training regimen, and signed up for our first educational session.  It quickly became evident during this training that we had been signed up for a platform far more robust than our needs.  Further, the products we had been assigned didn’t communicate with the accounting software we utilize.  About ten minutes into this meeting, I stopped the session and asked if the bankers could use language other than acronyms and banking phrases.  I then asked if they could communicate with us using simple terms.  Thankfully, we had a fabulous trainer, and she quickly assessed that we didn’t have the products best suited for our needs.  She made a pivot and showed us what she believed we should be using.  And she was correct.  The simpler products met all our needs and communicated with our accounting software.  During this exchange she made a reflective comment about the disservice that had been done by using banking acronyms and terminology that only they understood.

It struck me that many of us fall prey to the tendency of using language that isn’t as clear, direct, or simple as it could be.  In the process, it muddies the communication and leaves the listener feeling unsure.  It also puts the burden on the receiver to ask for more information or clearer instructions.  And sometimes they may not even know that they didn’t understand enough of the message to ask for more clarification.  It would be much easier if the communicator took the ownership of having their words and thoughts be direct and transparent.  Thankfully, the issue at the bank was quickly resolved and a great relationship exists between the institution and us.  However, think of the times where misunderstandings happen that permanently fracture relationships.  How many of these could have been avoided by clearer and more thoughtful communication?  Not making assumptions that everyone has the same perspective, shared understanding, or knowledge is a better platform to hold conversations. 

To this day, I still don’t know what the gadget does that we were sent in the mail from the bank.  And I still don’t know all the acronyms and terms the bankers used in our initial meeting.  But this is okay because it was “extra” that didn’t have to be there to make our banking experience great.  In fact, we probably would have been better served not getting the additional do-hickey in the mail because of the confusion it created.  Removing the extra do-hickeys in our own language could serve us all, too.

Changepoints:

Think of a time when someone used words, phrases, or acronyms you didn’t understand:

·        How did it feel to be without a full context or understanding because of the verbiage used by others?  What did you do to bridge the gap?

·        When might you inadvertently use words that isolate others because there is a lack of shared understanding?  How do these experiences hinder the relationships?

·        Who do you know who models clear, direct, and conscience communication?  How does it aid them and those around them?

·        What misunderstandings can be avoided when we chose simpler ways of communicating with others, both in personal and professional arenas?

o   What ways can you create checks-and-balances with your words to try to communicate clearly with others?

o   How can you let others know when you don’t fully understand what they are trying to say?

 

There is a time and place to use abbreviations, flowery language, and technical words.  Make sure you have the right audience and setting lest it become an unneeded communication do-hickey.

outSIGHTin, LLC: Creating awareness as a changepoint for improved organizational results.

Brands

Companies spend countless hours and dollars researching what resonates with consumers when designing concepts surrounding a brand.  Some of the most iconic brands use symbols and few, if any words, to create their logo.  Company logos communicate the essence of the brand.  There are brands so universally understood that their name is synonymous with the product.  How often do you say Kleenex for a tissue, Tylenol for acetaminophen, or Band-Aid for a bandage?  Talk about marketing and branding genius.

The past decade of my professional life has been spent in the agricultural world.  When I entered this career, I knew very little about the brands associated with the industry.  However, any lifelong farmer could have identified these in their sleep.  Now, I stand among those who know the company tied to bright red and the organization tied to vibrant green.  I don’t even need to be given the symbol or logo to know which piece of equipment belongs to which brand just by the colors.

Other products don’t have brands that have the same mental associations.  I travel extensively and yet I can’t readily describe many of the brands, logos, or even names of the products I routinely use.  Anyone know the brand of the charging block they use for their cell phone?  I don’t.  I just know it is very useful to me.  I am sure, however, there are people who have the same connection with the travel industry that I do with agriculture.  Branding is relative to the end-user.  Branding is also relative to the focus people place on it.  My kids can spout a laundry list of “must-have” brands that teenagers absolutely can NOT survive without.  I might not know all of these brand names, but I do know they cost this mama a pretty penny.

Think about the brands you are willing to spend a bit more money on.  Why do you open your checkbook for these products as opposed to other products where a generic suffices just fine for you?  Consumption of brands conveys something about what we value (quality, style, reputation, prestige, peer-pressure, etc).  And in essence, the people, activities, and material things we surround ourselves with are reflections of our values.  We give products logos and branding to delineate these values.  However, the same could be said for the way we spend our time and who we spend our time with.  Each carries its own “brand.”  This is why the resources in our world – people, time, things, activities – have a powerful ability to influence us.  Just like our favorite company does when they release its next best and newest.  Use the same discernment when selecting the influences in your life that are within your control.  And be selective, disciplined, and discerning in your own personal brand that you showcase to the world. There is only one of you and it is special.

Changepoints:

Study your favorite company, brand, or marketing influence and see how it correlates with the other areas of your life.

·        How do the things in your life reflect your values?  How do they complement or compete with your self-brand?

·        Who in your life do you admire for genuinely presenting themselves to the world?  How do they convey this image – or brand – to those around them?  

·        Which influences in your life could be diminished or increased to help you become the fuller version of the brand you want to show?

·        How does the freedom that comes with being authentic translate in the various part of your world?

o   What values are important to you to present to yourself and others?

o   How can you minimize messages that run contrary to them?

 

Branding forms a snapshot into the essence tied to the beliefs, mission, and values of the creator.

outSIGHTin, LLC: Creating awareness as a changepoint for improved organizational results.

Mirrors

Go to a hotel lobby, entryway of a home, or any space designed to welcome people and you will typically be greeted by a mirror.  Presumably it is to allow guests to make an assessment before presenting themselves.  People often take a glance and make the adjustments they deem necessary.  Conduct a quick experiment and watch people as they pass mirrors: almost inevitably they will pause and do a quick inventory.  Without fail, the draw of the mirror lures us in to take a peek.

Ever notice, however, that not all mirrors present a perfect reflection?  In fact, the comedy of most circus fun houses is the distorted mirror room where we take on all shapes and sizes.  The power of a mirror is also why people want a full-length mirror in the closet or bedrooms.  It’s why people strategically place lights near mirrors in bathrooms and why housekeepers are tasked with keeping them clean.  The mirror provides information, so a bright, clean, full surface is desirable.

The reflecting quality of a mirror tells the viewer to pay attention.  Where we place our focus impacts what we process so it is the very reason we should pay attention to the messages we are given.  However, the reflection in the mirror is as useful as what we do with it.  It is only as vibrant as the light surrounding it.  It’s accuracy stems from how clean the surface is and the quality of the materials used in the manufacture of the mirror.  Mindlessly trusting that a mirror provides an image that is reflected with 100% accuracy can limiting, and sometimes dangerous.  Hence, automobile mirrors have signs on them that say, “Objects are closer than they appear.”  The convex design is great for field of view but at the cost of making things appear smaller than they are so the brain believes they are farther away.  The message helps prevent accidents caused by a tool that is intended to benefit the driver. 

We have mirrors that surround us in all facets of life: work, family, medical, personal, faith, and academic, just to name a few.  Some mirrors are unavoidable, but the choice to stare at it is ours.  The decision to internalize parts or all the information is our choice as well.  Fortunately, the placement of other mirrors is within our control.  Select these mirrors wisely.  Do they provide reflections, information, and messages that help you see yourself fully?  Positively?  Accurately?  Can you make the necessary adjustments in your life when you pass by these mirrors?  Better yet, own your own pocket-mirror you can pull out when you want to self-reflect, at it is one of the singular best ways to develop an authentic self-construct and image.

Changepoints:

Find a mirror you use frequently and assess what is impacting the reflection.  Use this experience to ponder:

·        Who are the people in your life who provide reflections that add value to your life?

·        What do you tend to do when reflections, suggestions, or critiques are provided to you?  Does your normal response help or hinder your growth?

·        Which mirrors in your life can be placed strategically so the reflections don’t become overwhelming, addicting, or paralyzing?

·        How captive or free are you from the influence outside reflections in your life have on you?

o   How can you manifest an internal gauge about what you wish to internalize or disregard?

o   How are you developing your own practice of self-guided reflecting?

 

Surround yourself with the right light, materials, and placement so the mirrors in your life create a helpful image.

outSIGHTin, LLC: Creating awareness as a changepoint for improved organizational results.

Ingredients

People define “cooking” depending on their view of what it should constitute.  I follow the mental notion that taking premade products from the grocery store and heating them up isn’t cooking.  It’s simply completing the process provided by another.  There isn’t anything wrong with this.  I just don’t connect it with my definition of cooking.  As such, there aren't very many fully assembled freezer meals at my house.  My fridge and freezer are full, but they are loaded with individual items.  This isn’t to say you won’t find prepackaged granola bars or fruit snacks in the cupboard for my kids, but as a rule, my kitchen is void of most preassembled products.  Call it frugal, controlling, or healthier, but it’s the route I take with most food in my household.

This must not be the state of all kitchens, because I heard my daughter talking about how we are an ingredient house.  I had stumbled upon the conversation so I thought maybe I misunderstood what she was saying.  I asked for clarification, and she said, “At some houses I find food already made. For instance, they might have a package of chocolate chip cookies.  At our house you would find floor, sugar, and chocolate chips.  It’s a great thing, because you can decide to make the cookies yourself or in my case, you just eat the chocolate chips.  That’s why I say we are an ingredient house.” 

What an interesting observation.  Some people might find the inconvenience of having to make your own cookies a burden.  Instead, she focused on the advantages that come with having freedom to pick whatever ingredients are available.  I probed a bit more and asked what she thought about already assembled products.  In that conversation she commented on how the ease and speed provided benefits.  Both scenarios prompted a response that was positive and embracing of the upsides of each.

In our personal lives, perhaps we could view our world as having both ingredient and assembled houses.  Sometimes we need to look for the ingredients that will make the recipe successful.  Other times we can decide to embrace the whole package.  Maybe there are relationships, projects, or work that would benefit from an ingredient approach where we find the assets that are helpful.  Focusing on the positive ingredients can make processes more rewarding, just like the chocolate chips my daughter mentioned.  In other cases, we might be able to embrace the whole totality, knowing that doing so provides its own benefits of fullness, efficiency, and convenience.

There is more than one way to get a cookie into a kitchen.  Bake it with individual ingredients or buy it premade.  Either way, the reward is enjoying the dessert.

Changepoints:

Think of the ways in which you or those around you get a meal to the table:

·        What are the upsides of cooking a meal from scratch?  What are the upsides of buying a meal already prepared?  How does this mindset transfer to other areas of your life?

·        What are the downsides of only valuing ingredient-based cooking or only purchasing premade meals?  What areas of your life have this narrow-view and how can you shift the thinking?

·        Who are the people around you who tend to be flexible in accepting the various ways that the world can present itself?

·        How do the thoughts tied to meal prep translate to other areas in your life where you can decide to take an ingredient approach in some facets and a whole package approach in other facets?

o   How might you experience more satisfaction or relief and less frustration or discouragement if you avoided using a singular approach in your relationships or projects?

o   How can you embrace this model with your own views regarding yourself and self-acceptance? 

The act of live is much like getting dinner to our mouths – there are many ways to get the job done.

outSIGHTin, LLC: Creating awareness as a changepoint for improved organizational results.

Embassies

Twice in the past year, I have had encounters with government embassies.  Both experiences challenged my notion about what I previously believed to be stifled entities.  One experience was in Athens and the other was in Amsterdam.  The necessity for each was due to miscalculations and missteps on my end.

While traveling by train to the Athenian airport to return home, our train stopped.  This is no exaggeration.  The train stopped unannounced for almost an hour.  Not speaking the language, I was baffled until two locals explained that this happens on occasion.  By the time I got to the airport, I was scrambling.  I knew I had no time to get through customs.  As I was waiting in line, I heard an American family lamenting about the cost of having to reschedule five plane tickets because they hadn’t left enough time the day prior for customs and therefore missed their flights.  By this time panic is starting to creep in.  I get to the front counter and tell the representative about my recent woes on the train.  She looks at her watch and then my scheduled departure time.  Her facial expression gives away her concern without uttering a word.  I look at her and say, “I know this isn’t your fault or your problem, but is there any way you can help me?”

Kindness spreads through her face and she said, “It is easier to offer help when someone is nice and asks for it.”  She types away on her computer while reviewing my passport.  At this point I’m unsure what she is doing, but I’ve decided to be positive regardless of the outcome because she is being so generous with me.  I know her job can’t be easy when frequent fliers are often cranky at best.  As I’m contemplating my next step if I miss the only flight out that day to my destination, she hands me a piece of paper.  I ask her what it is, and she says, “You are going through the embassy clearance line.”  Without fully grasping the impact of what she is saying, I thank her and quickly go to customs.  I hand the card to the gatekeeper who then steers me to a line that is essentially vacant save for a few men in line wearing sharp suits.  I’m not dressed the part at all, but everyone gives me utmost care.  Not a single person at the embassy checkpoint treated me with distain because of my disheveled appearance.  I later learn that I received treatment typically given to dignitaries, which is why I catch my flight with minutes to spare. 

The next experience with an embassy was also due to a travel woe: a lost passport.  For several hours, I thought my passport had been lost in the taxi from the airport to the hotel.  I was advised to go to the American consulate as my trip was very short.  Thankfully, the consulate was only a short walk away, so I went to the gate.  Unannounced, of course.  And on a Friday afternoon.  Lovely Kiley. 

The guard behind the gate is a brood of a man and he isn’t cracking a smile upon my arrival.  I proceed to chatter at him nervously about my passport misstep.  Pretty soon, he is laughing at my prose as I recount my day to him.  He asks when my flight is departing back to America.  Sheepishly I tell him that I leave on Monday.  He tries to hide his surprise but can tell that I’m genuinely getting concerned about what I will do.  Afterall, its not everyday that I lose my passport in another country with only a few days to spare.  He then pauses and says, “I am going to see what I can do for you.”  I stand outside the gate for a long period of time and then he returns with a form.  He instructs me that I have been granted an appointment on Monday morning to get an emergency passport created if my original passport doesn’t surface in the meanwhile.  At this point, he is outside the gate because he must hand me the documents.  So, I do what any normal person does with a huge government security guard: I hug him.  The man who previously hadn’t cracked a smile is now grinning from ear to ear.  All because of an interaction tied to a request for help.

The embassy in Greece and the consulate in the Netherlands dispelled my preconceived notions about formal government entities.  But more importantly, both agencies showed what goodness can flow with a simple, sincere request for help.  Most people are abundantly capable and willing to meet us where we are at when we let them into our world.

Changepoints:

Think of a time when you asked for help, and it was bestowed upon you:

·        How did the experience expand your perspective and trust in the value of asking for help?

·        What opportunities do you have to provide help to others, especially when asked specifically for it?

·        What emotional, mental, or physical benefits are tied to giving and receiving help?

·        How does the process of engaging in helpfulness create community among the participants?

o   What stewardship groups exist that you could contribute to?

o   How can you be open to receiving help that would lighten your load so you can then pay other forms of help forward to others?

 

Each of us is a living embassy equipped to partake in helpfulness.

outSIGHTin, LLC: Creating awareness as a changepoint for improved organizational results.

Oil Change

A new auto service company opened near my workplace, so I decided it would be nice to support a local company over the national company I used in the past.  Because my Subaru Outback was now three years old, I didn’t feel as compelled to go to the dealer to have regular maintenance completed.  So, I decided to give this new company a whirl.  I called to make an appointment, and I was greeted by a friendly gentleman who asked what I was needing.  I told him I needed an oil change.  And this is where the conversation got tricky.

“What type of oil change would you like to get?” the kindly mechanic asked me.  “Umm…an oil change,” I cautiously replied.  He cheerfully responded, “Let me help here.  Do you want a conventional or synthetic oil change?”  A big pause was followed by, “Umm…I didn’t know there was a difference, but I would guess I wouldn’t want something synthetic, would I?  Maybe I should get the real oil change?”  Unbeknownst to me, I had entered the role of comedian because this man started to laugh.  And by laugh, I mean gut-laugh.  He truly wasn’t being rude at all; he was laughing in delight.  After composing himself he said, “Honey, let’s take a minute to learn together.  If it were my car, I would get the synthetic, because it is better in the long run for your car.  This is one time where synthetic isn’t a bad thing.  It’ll cost you more, but I believe it is worth the investment.”

I proceeded to thank him for graciously helping me through my ignorance.  His next words were profound, “You aren’t any different than the rest of us.  We all didn’t know something important at one point in time.  That’s why we are here to teach each other.”  He is, of course, correct.  For instance, I didn’t attain my doctorate and write my dissertation without first learning how to craft a sentence.  And there was a time when this mechanic didn’t know all the components that make up a car.  Yet today he is a master technician, to which I am grateful.  I may love the world of wordsmithing, but I’ll leave the automobile talents to him.

It would be a kinder world if everyone gave learners the same grace the mechanic gave me.  He could have scoffed at my lack of knowledge, but instead he chose to walk alongside and teach me.  Perhaps more people would have an openness to trying new things and taking new adventures if there was safety in doing so.  We all have areas of expertise where we can gift our knowledge to others.  Conversely, we all have areas of lack where we can be recipients of the gift of another’s knowledge. Teacher meet Student.  Student meet Teacher. 

Changepoints:

Consider a skillset, hobby, interest, discipline, knowledge, or path you have been curious to explore:

·        How could you introduce yourself to this unchartered area?

·        Who is a trust expert, business, or friend who could impart their wisdom or provide needed guidance?

·        What areas of expertise or giftedness have you been given that you could share with others?  How will you go about sharing this with others?

·        How does giving and receiving knowledge from others break down barriers tied to fear?

o   What would newfound confidence or a newly acquired skillset do for you?  For those around you?

o   Why are we responsible to be good stewards with the gifts and talents we have been given?

 

Sometimes a little motor oil is all a person needs to realize that teaching opportunities are just a vehicle away.

outSIGHTin, LLC: Creating awareness as a changepoint for improved organizational results.

Mowing

Using a lawnmower wasn’t a skill I possessed until my late thirties.  Admittedly, I dodged this task by virtue of having a dad who enjoyed the outdoors and liked mowing.  Later, my brothers assumed this task and eventually I married a man who was meticulous in the lawncare department.  To reveal the depth of my ineptness, I will share about the first time I was asked to mow.  My father-in-law at the time asked me to start the mower.  Eager to help, I went to the garage to rev up the engine.  However, there was no “ON” button for me to push.  I searched and searched, but alas I was defeated.  I came back inside and told him about my lack of success.  Being a wonderful human being, he simply smiled and chuckled.  He assured me it was okay and took care of it.  Missing my opportunity to learn from a pro, I went about my merry way.  Only years later when I purchased my own lawnmower did I realize what a dolt he must have thought he inherited for a daughter-in-law.  It was a good lesson in the power of allowing a naïve gal to save face.

Fast forward to my late thirties when I was newly single and needed to manicure the lawn.  I went to the local hardware store and trapped an unsuspecting salesperson.  He didn’t know what he was stumbling upon when he decided to help me purchase this lawnmowing beast.  But he quickly assessed that I had no clue what I was doing (which was given away when he said, “You really have NEVER mowed a lawn before?!”).  Thankfully, he decided I was his newfound project.  He took me everywhere in the store to teach me about the oil it uses, where to fill the gas, how to tell when the blades need sharpening, and basically how to avoid losing any digits in the process of cutting the grass.  It was here that I also learned that mowers are started with a pull-chord and not a magic button I was previously searching for.  He was a good man. 

When we ended our adventure together, he said, “If you were my daughter, I’d tell to enjoy the process of mowing the lawn.”  Apparently, my doubtful look gave me away, because then he said, “It’s one of the few beautiful things in life where you instantly get to see the benefit of your handiwork.  Take this approach and I promise you’ll feel differently about mowing your lawn.” 

To my shock, he was right.  Every pass I made across my lawn was proof of my effort.  As I went along, I noticed that the smell of the grass was amazing.  The sun was energizing, and I was getting a few extra steps in for the day.  After I finished the task, I decided to think about other areas where the same thing applies and folding laundry and shoveling snow both came to mind.  With laundry, the smell of fresh clothes and seeing the neatly folded piles is rewarding.  With shoveling, the fresh air and soaking in the pure white of clean snow is incredible.

These are only a few examples but the lesson can be expanded upon.  When we take tasks and decide to look for areas of incremental completion and the gifts given along the way, it changes how it feels to embark upon it.  If there is a book to read, chunk the assignment by chapters.  If there is a report that is due, break it down into palatable sections.  Create to-do-lists for the mental sake of feeling the euphoria of checking things off.  Even simply making the bed in the morning can set a positive tone for the entire day.

And in the process of tackling a new task, you just might learn something cool like a lawnmower starts by using a bit of brute strength powered with the ingenuity of physics.

Changepoints:

Consider the steps of mowing the lawn, folding laundry, of shoveling snow:

·        What similar steps could be applied in your personal or professional life?

·        How would an incremental approach change the way you view tasks in your life that you’d rather avoid?

·        Who do you have in your inner circle who would be able to help you set goals and the subset steps required to complete them?

·        What are the first tasks you can set about accomplishing?

o   How does seeing visual completion of a step help create motivation for the next step?

o   How could achievement of these tasks lead to bigger dreams?

 

Like mowing a lawn, achieving most goals is accomplished one step, one pass, one row at a time.

outSIGHTin, LLC: Creating awareness as a changepoint for improved organizational results.